| Should I date a married man? |
|
I’ve been working in an advertising firm for the last 3 years and more recently I’ve been getting hit on by one of my male colleagues. He’s ten years older than me, married with two children and he’s very powerful and successful – not to mention very attractive! We’ve always noticed each other, but over the last 4 months we’ve been spending more time together having coffees and flirting at after work drinks. Last week he flat out told me that he wanted to take me on the office desk! He’s said he’s not looking for anything serious right now, but he said I was amazing and that he couldn’t stop thinking about me. I know he has a bit of a reputation, but the way we connect is unbelievable. Do you think I should start dating him and do we have a chance? Oh dear! It’s time for some home truths. No I don’t think you should start dating him and no you don’t have a chance with him. For starters, he has a reputation as being a player – so he has a pattern. He likes to chase, have sex and then move on to the next young thing in the office. History tends to repeat itself! He’s also told you he’s not looking for anything serious. That’s man speak for “I want sex with no strings attached, I’m not serious about you.” Put simply, he’s not keen on long term. There’s also the fact that he’s married with kids. There are many eligible guys out there for you – why chose one who likes to cheat on and deceive his most trusted and close companion who’s also the mother to his kids? Think of the sisterhood here! If you were married with kids how would you feel if your husband was shagging office girls behind your back? Also what does this say about his view of marriage? What would stop him from doing this to you if you ended up together? This man is not treating his wife or other women around him with respect. The warning bells are ringing loud and clear, and I would recommend you don’t get caught in his path of destruction. Instead, I suggest you immediately cut down your contact with him as much as possible, tell him you respect his wife too much to go any further, and start flirting with guys that are single and interested in something long term. |
Please feel free to send your questions and comments to John Aiken.
By sending in your question you consent to them being published on the John Aiken Advice website.
Due to time restrictions, John Aiken will not be able to answer all questions. However, any consultation and information provided to addressee(s)/recipient(s) by John Aiken and Johnaikenadvice.com is based solely on the specific information given to John Aiken by the addressee(s), and is in no way to replace the advice the addressee(s)/recipient(s) may obtain from a medical practitioner, legal consultant, therapist, other health practitioner, related discipline professional, or common sense, personal values, needs, boundaries and information. With receipt of any email, including all content, addressee(s)/recipient(s) indemnify both John Aiken, Johnaikenadvice.com, or any other party, against any injuries, loss, or problems to the addressee(s)/recipient(s).









