Why don’t women like nice guys?

I’m a 35 year old single guy who’s been on my own for some time. I’ve tried every option so far – internet sites, matchmaking services, set-ups from friends and even blind dates. All my friends can’t understand why I haven’t been able to settle down. When I date different women, they usually seem to give me the same feedback– “I’m a nice guy but there’s no chemistry.” I’ve always tried to make a point of treating women with respect, making them feel special on dates and doing whatever I can to get them to like me – but it’s just not working. At the end of the day, am I being too nice?

The short answer is yes. In the world of dating, being a nice guy and putting your love interest on a pedestal means you going to lose every time! Single people want to meet someone who’s going to challenge them, express their opinions, take the initiative, and show some strength. Sure, it’s important to compromise and listen to the other person, but you’ve got to be yourself and not be afraid of putting yourself first. If you don’t, then you’ll come across as being needy and desperate, clingy and wet. At the moment, you’re so worried about trying to please your dates, that it’s backfiring because you’re not being their equal – you’re being their doormat. Start behaving differently with dates from now on. Take the lead, organize the evenings, express your opinions, say ‘no’, and be assertive. Hold back from being ‘too available’, continue to hang out with your own separate friends and stop worrying about what they think. In the end, this will make you more of a challenge and keep them interested.

 

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